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Olive: Women Have A Savior Syndrome That Attracts Them To Abusive Men

Contemplating why women easily break up with broke rather than abusive men, Olive Najjuma reasoned that women have a savior instinct that makes them believe they will be able to change the person.

According to Olive, women view broke men as people with nothing to offer, but an abusive man with money can be a reason for their stay.

She added, “we have something scientists call the ‘savior syndrome’. If a guy is into drugs or is an alcoholic and other self-harming behaviors, you feel like you can love him into changing and healing. So if the man beats a woman, she confidently thinks that one day he will realize her is the best for him and no one else can handle him better.”

To her, the idea of women attracted to abusive and toxic men is because they are presented with a challenge that will earn them a prize. However, she considered it idealistic because, most times, such men have narcissistic tendencies that make the woman fearful that she can ever live happily without that person.

Cynthia, a caller on the show, agreed with Olive saying that women are biologically nurturers who get attracted to toxic men and try to understand their troubles so they can change them.

Fatboy wondered whether the perception does not influence men to become more abusive since it makes nice guys unappreciated.

“Women need to change their preferences and reward men who treat them nicely. Reward men who show you love, respect and care because the more you do that for abusive men, you are signaling to nice men that they should cease being nice or become bad boys.”

He asked the ladies, “don’t you think that women can break this cycle by denying these abusive men love and devotion and giving it to the guys treating them nicely? Forgive them for being boring and broke but encourage more men to be nice to you.”

Experts also warn that bad boys are incapable of change. For instance, men who have cheated before are likely to cheat over and over. They add that even when a woman successfully changes them, they find them boring because they wouldn’t be as irresistible as they used to be.

The Fatboy show is hosted by James Onen aka Fatboy, Olive, and Sarah every weekday from 6 am to 10 am on RX Radio.

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