When a relationship hits a dead end, most partners decide to call it off even though it is hurtful and painful for one or both of them.
Often breakups happen due to poor communication, infidelity, and inadequate sexual satisfaction. The healing process is equally different for different people.
On The Fatboy Show today, Olive Najjuma said past relationship traumas affect one’s perceptions about other people and their future relationships.
“If you have been lied to in the past, gaining trust even in a new relationship is hard. Your ability to recognize honesty in an individual will be affected,” Olive said
“If you have been cheated on before, it will be hard to believe that someone can be loyal. Unless you've healed from your past relationships, your experience will affect your new relationship,” she reasoned.
Nevertheless, James Onen, the co-presenter of the show explained that whereas trauma affects both men and women, the latter can deal with it more easily than their male counterparts.
He argued that men tend to cling to pain caused by a breakup, longer than women because they usually invest more in the relationship.
“When courting, the man persuades the woman. He tries to obtain her interest through gifts and other romantic gestures and when they start dating, he still holds the relationship on his shoulders. Meanwhile, the woman is expected to bring her body and affection, which are expressed sexually. In other words, a lot goes into pursuing and maintaining her when all she has to do is sit back and enjoy,” Fatboy said.
Fatboy opined that men bring in the effort, money, and time to a relationship such that the thought of repeating the investment into another relationship becomes daunting, in turn affecting their actions in a new relationship.
The Fatboy show is hosted by James Onen aka Fatboy, Olive, and Sarah every weekday from 6 am to 10 am on RX Radio.